Six years ago today my Mom was taken to the ICU for reasons unknown at the time. We had thought it was related to her heart condition (she had surgery earlier in the year and a stent was implanted in her heart), but as it turned out she had a ruptured bowel.
She died from it on November 7th, but that is for a later post. But today begins a particular cycle of anniversaries of her final weeks, for the dates now fall upon the days-of-the week as they occurred in 2005, the first time this has happened since her death that year.
Not that it really makes these anniversaries any different, it is just another year. But somehow the coincidence of dates and days makes them a little more, I don’t know, poignant is a word that comes to mind. A special emotional feeling triggering the heart and mind in a way that is unique to the event.
I was originally going to post this at my other blog, The Four Last Things, and indeed later today an edited version of it may appear there, but I changed it to here for now as anniversaries of this sort can also be triggers for a relapse.
Those of us who are alcoholics have minds that are moody, even after years of sobriety (nearly 9 1/2 for me). Emotional mood swings and responses are not unheard of, even though they may level out and not seem as extreme as they were during the old drinking days or early sobriety. Nevertheless they are there and pose a risk.
Not that I am in danger of a relapse, I have no intention of drinking “despite” the anniversaries and certain other stresses in my life. But still I must remain aware of the dangers to my sobriety and continued ability to remain a responsible, contributing member of society.
Life just sucks at times and during those periods we have to just “suck it up” and deal with it as best we can, and accept help from whatever quarters it is offered. Pray a lot and reflect.Know someone, perhaps yourself, who might like Catholic devotionals for alcoholics? Please take a look at my books! (Thank you!!)"The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics"