Category Archives: Me

The Anniversary of my Father’s Death

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On this date in 1995 my father died.

He and I weren’t very close, (“fathers and sons …”) generational and attitudinal differences separated us.

As a result, I didn’t really grieve over his death. I mean, I was saddened and did feel the loss, but I wasn’t ripped apart by his death like I was over my Mom’s 10 years later.

This relative lack of impact was aided by the fact that I was 2,500 miles away and hadn’t seen him in 4 years.

I went home for his funeral, and reconnected with the family, but when I returned home to California I continued life as usual. I had started drinking heavily to cope with life’s problems a year before (failed romance) and my drinking picked up a little more upon my return, so that may have softened the need to grieve in a sober manner.

The point of this is that although I wasn’t too close to Dad during his life, I am much closer to him now. That would seem strange to non-Catholics, but for believers with a knowledge of the Communion of Saints, that shouldn’t seem strange at all.

Death doesn’t end a life. Death is just a passage from this life to another. This life is temporary, everything “is”, and then passes away to dust and a dim memory. The life after is eternal. Whether that life is spent in Heaven or Hell depends on what you do in your Earthly life.

There is a connection between those of us still here on Earth and those deceased. It is called, as I referenced in a previous paragraph, the Communion of Saints . (Via New Advent.) This is comprised of the “Church Militant” (those still on Earth), the “Church Suffering” (those in Purgatory) and the “Church Triumphant” (those in Heaven). Only the souls that have damned themselves to Hell are excluded.

“Communion” implies a community, wherein the members still can relate to one another. This relation is conducted by the means of prayer. We pray to the Church Triumphant and the Church Suffering for their intercessory power with God. We can somehow sense their presence (although admittedly that “sensing” may be wishful thinking).

They are there to help, comfort and console us. We are separated from them by the chasm of death, but that chasm can be crossed eventually by our own deathly passage.

I said earlier in this post that I am much closer to Dad now than while he was alive. I have grown to be much like him, at least with regard to the practice of my Catholic Faith. (I still haven’t taken up woodworking as a hobby, nor returned to fishing as a pastime, but may in time. I do enjoy yardwork, like he did, and love baseball, too.) I understand him better as the years progress and as I grow older.

To anyone who has lost a parent (or anyone beloved) to death, fear not. They are not gone from you permanently. Consider them as just having moved far away, and the distance you need to travel to meet with them again will take the rest of your life.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Shhh…. This is a cheat post

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I posted something regarding the annual Sober Catholic novena to St.Maximilian Kolbe and noticed in my blog editor that I didn’t post at all in July 2021. That marks the first time that has happened since I began this project in January 2007. Oftentimes I notice near the end of the month that I hadn’t yet posted during it and would cobble up something, anything, and post; I have this crazed dedication to posting at least once a month. 

So, this is a cheat post. It was actually written on August 4th, 2021, but backdated to July 31, 2021. (Just so that the Post Archives dropdown menu doesn’t show a missing month. Oh, yes, I do have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) 😉 

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

On the Sacred Heart of Jesus and me

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Today is the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. Devotion to the Sacred Heart is one of the most identifiably Catholic devotions, second only to the Rosary.

It is almost as old. Jesus gave St. Gertrude the Great interior locutions on the 13th Century telling her about the depths of His love for us. Earlier in that same century Our Lady gave St. Dominic the basics of what is the Rosary.

I can’t go into great detail regarding the revelations to St. Gertrude, as I am only beginning to read a classic book on that. Many of us are more familiar with His revelations to St. Margaret Mary Alacoque in the 17 Century which established the modern devotional practices.

The point of this post is simple: Since the beginning of June I’ve been really getting interested in the Sacred Heart Devotion. I’ve been ‘into it’ for years, I’ve done the Nine First Fridays and I am really devoted to visiting Him in the Blessed Sacrament. I’ve meditated using devotional books on it; and I ‘get’ the basic fundamental gist of the devotion: that is the Sacred Heart is Jesus’ intense, sacrificial love for us, and our response to that love by loving Him in return with a love that sets our own hearts and souls aflame; including loving Him on behalf of those who don’t. But for but for some reason the fundamental aspect didn’t really resonate; that may not make all that much sense but the only way I can explain it is that the ‘feeling’ of the Devotion didn’t go too deep. It didn’t move me like the Rosary does and Marian feast days do, or the Divine Mercy Devotion and Divine Mercy Sunday.

But this year is different: I saw that June was coming up and I’m like all excited, “It’s the Sacred Heart Month! It’s the Sacred Heart Month!!” I’m finally reading this book: Love, Peace And Joy: Devotion To The Sacred Heart Of Jesus According To St. Gertrude The Great which is a boon to me; it’s really opened up my heart and mind to the essence of the devotion and its spiritual impact and effects.

Jesus’ love for us is so intense that it supplies what is lacking in our prayers and desires. It ‘fixes our past,’ not by a manner of temporal engineering and changing that past, but by burying our sinful past in His Heart (“Let go, and let God.”) we can find redemption in a tangible manner. The Sacred Heart Devotion, when combined with reception of the Eucharist and visits to the Blessed Sacrament make Jesus feel less like an abstraction and more of a real live entity. No wonder that the Sacred Heart Devotion has been popular amongst those who are more ‘traditional’ and who practice true holy piety (that sense of affectionate respect and love for God and His Church.)

It’s weird, but that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

St. Rita and me

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Do you think it’s possible that a saint can select you to be a client of theirs, rather than the usual way of us picking someone because we were named after them or something about their life resonated with us? 

Today is the Feast of St. Rita of Cascia; it’s also my sobriety date. Nineteen years sober! Anyway, I was soooooo not the poster child for early sobriety or for working the 12 Steps, and given that Rita is the patroness of ‘impossible cases,’ I was wondering if it was possible that she was summoned by God and was told, “Hey, Rita baby, I got one for you. Real tough job. Think you can handle it, kiddo?” And that was that.

Just wondering…

    I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    Holy Saturday and the Harrowing of Hell

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    Today is Holy Saturday and I hope that your Lent has been a fine and fruitful one. I didn’t blog except for a few times (I was ‘around’ but taken up with things.) The seasons come and they go; we as Catholics learn to live with the Liturgical Year as it helps us with the rhythms of the spiritual life. Many people decide to vanish from being online during Lent; while I don’t do that I did spend it in a somewhat reflective mood. I had my daily routine: awaken and grab a cuppa coffee, do my morning prayers and devotions and then watch a Daily Latin Mass on YouTube. Then on to the days’ activities: garden prepping, or miscellaneous household duties. Sometimes exploring income opportunities (which I do have to expand upon.) See this post: Bathtub Blogging, on my other blog.

    But the days passed, I pondered Lent, and took things one day at a time. And now we have all arrived at the end. Today is Holy Saturday, a day which I always viewed, even as a child, as a day to spend in meditative prayer or pondering. Despite the Easter Vigil Mass in the evening, it always seemed to be a day to ‘pause,’ sandwiched in between Good Friday and Easter Sunday, the two ‘big’ liturgical days. While the Good Friday services are not obligatory (they should be) it still feels ‘odd’ to consider not attending. And the Easter Vigil Mass is also not an obligation (if you do not go, then you must attend an Easter Sunday Mass.) So, there are things one can definitely do on Friday and Sunday, but Holy Saturday? Where was Jesus, even? “He descended to the Dead” the Creed informs us.

    Called the Harrowing of Hell, it is referred to in 1 Peter 4:6 “For because of this, the Gospel was also preached to the dead, so that they might be judged, certainly, just like men in the flesh, yet also, so that they might live according to God, in the Spirit.” and in Ephesians 4:9 “…what is left except for him also to descend, first to the lower parts of the earth?’

    Courtesy Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

    What did he do there? He preached to all the Righteous who had died since the times of Adam and Eve. All of the Just who died before Heaven was reopened at His Ascension were gathered and received the Gospel. From Adam and Eve, to St. John the Baptist and his own foster father, St. Joseph, as well as countless others who died in God’s friendship but were banned from Heaven due to Adam’s sin.

    He appeared to them, fresh from His Passion on the streets of Jerusalem and Calvary. He showed them His wounds, all the stripes He had suffered for the sins of all…. and they knew that the time of the banishment was over.

    Who knows how much longer we have. We could die at any moment. Heaven is no longer barred to us, but Purgatory is a possibility for those who died in God’s graces but are not sufficiently cleansed from the impurities of sin. (NOTE: I do not wish to debate the doctrine of Purgatory. I have found that debating is quite pointless in these times and I lack the temperament required. I rarely do it and then only when I am moved to. But Purgatory is logical, and fits in with God’s mercy. The idea that a person could live a life of sinful depravity, and convert on their deathbed and go straight to Heaven just like a person who has died after living a life of heroic virtue, piety and sacrifice, is ridiculous. Both die in God’s graces, and upon death see God during their individual judgment, and yearn to be united to Him. Both burn with the desire for God and the latter (the holy person) enters into Heaven whereas the former (the sinner) still retaining the sins of their life, is prevented from admission because ‘nothing impure can enter the Kingdom  of Heaven.’ (Rev 21:27)  Their burning desire for God becomes like unto a fire of purgation, burning away the impurities  of their soul for as long as they are attached to the sins. This is an imprecise and simplistic recounting of what could occur, but it gets the idea across. Purgatory is the ‘entrance’ into Heaven. Some pass into Heaven without feeling the purgation because they offered their sufferings here in Earth; they essentially did their Purgatory already. Others need cleaning up.

    So, Holy Saturday could be a day to ponder your afterlife. Where do you think you’ll be heading to? Lent was all about growing closer to the Lord by embracing His Passion and Death, by learning to accept the crosses that come into our life in hopes of becoming a better disciple. We suffered enough as alcoholics and addicts. And we caused enough suffering to others. Have you atoned and repented of these? Made amends? Get going while there’s still time. For we know not the day or the hour when the time allotted to us is over and we are summoned to our destiny.I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    The Probably Not Gonna Be Happening Sober Catholic Podcast

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    If you are a subscriber to either the Sober Catholic Facebook Page, the Sober Catholic SP3RN Page, or even the Sober Catholic Telegram Channel, then you know that I was exploring the possibility of starting a Sober Catholic Podcast. This is something I’ve thought and prayed about ever since I began this blog in 2007. “All the cool Catholics” have podcasts and so I should too, even though I’m not cool.

    I had seen in my WordPress subscriptions a post regarding “Turning your WordPress blog into a podcast with Anchor.” It seemed interesting: you connect your blog to Anchor.fm, your blogpost archive gets uploaded and you can then use these as scripts to record a podcast, with either your own voice or a text-to-speech robovoice (which actually didn’t sound bad.) They provide incidental music and sound that can be used as background effects, and there you go: a podcast which they even distribute to numerous podcasting services.

    So I signed up. Unfortunately, not all of the posts got uploaded. I submitted a Help Ticket and they replied a day later stating that they can only upload the most recent 250 posts. Nice, but I have nearly 1,200 posts and my intent was to resurrect the oldest ones and gradually continue forward. I even thought of a schedule, every Friday I’d release a podcast of a “Classic” Sober Catholic post, with current posts that I thought are podcast worthy would be done on other days.

    But the 250 post limit wipes out the advantage. So I figured that I can just manually upload classic posts as scripts (to perhaps take advantage of the text-to-speech,) but today I found that I can’t do that. So, that eliminates another advantage to using Anchor as a podcast service.

    Therefore, as a result, I am leaning strongly against podcasting. Like I said, I had thought about it for years, never did it, and quite probably if I was ever going to I would have done it by now. Anchor.fm provided a relatively easy way to overcome my reticence, but their tech limitations of upload limit/no upload of text to be used as scripts essentially brings me back to the proverbial ‘Square one’ of podcasting: Do most everything myself. Anchor promised a virtually ‘pain-‘ and ‘hassle-free’ approach to podcasting; utilize already existing work with the rest being fairly automated (I know laying additional audio tracks requires some effort, but if most everything else is done for me, I can manage that.) But the above cited tech limitations or lack of functions pull me way out of my comfort zone.

    I can still use old posts and record them on my MacBookAir. I can upload them to Anchor.fm and use some of their stock audio to spruce up the episode. So why am I disinclined to podcast, when it’s just a little more work for me to do?

    If you are reading this and answering that it’s because I’m a lazy bum for seeing all these issues as obstacles, then you aren’t aware of two things: I HATE THE SOUND OF MY VOICE almost as much as I HATE SPEAKING!!! This is why I prefer the printed word of blogging over podcasting and why I always shied away from the latter. Anchor.fm’s easy-peasy system had the virtue of helping me to overcome my inherent personal issues to podcasting; but not enough, for now.I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    Distractions and anxiety

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    I noticed the other day that I haven’t blogged in over a month. This isn’t an apology nor an explanation, but just commentary about ‘distractions and anxiety.’

    Lots of things have been going on in both the Church and the secular world. The Church passed through Advent, Christmas and on through Epiphany and the Baptism of the Lord. Typically I would have blogged a bit on any one or a number of them. Not that I am a liturgical blogger, but one of the themes of this blog is that the liturgical year provides a rhythm and framework about which to live out the year. Not that I am always diligent in blogging during key seasons; I’ve been absent before during them and can promise you that it will happen again! Nevertheless, this goes beyond just focusing on the season and trying to live out the spirituality and forgetting or neglecting to bring insights to readers.

    I’ve been distracted and downright freakishly anxious about the state of the world. USA Presidential election results were being disputed; and it doesn’t matter who would have won, either side was prepared to claim the other ‘cheated’ if their side lost. Carry this forward to the threat of political violence by the loser to protest the ‘stolen election.’ The threat of a civil war appears real. And I don’t really think it’s over.

    So, in observing current events I decided to withdraw and not blog. Sad to say I didn’t withdraw from social media. I would have retained a greater deal of sanity if I had.

    The civil war is for now a ‘cold’ one. No fighting or anything like that. But ruptures in online friendships as people ‘take sides’ and cannot tolerate an opposing point of view or conviction. I confess to having ‘unfriended’ people; primarily because they crossed a line of toxicity and illogic.

    Oh, well. I’m back to blogging. I hope your Advent went well, that you got to Confession and Mass and grew spiritually and religiously. Perhaps you reread old Sober Catholic posts on the season to compensate for my not having written anything new.

    Lent is almost upon us and I hope to use that to boost my blogging. Later, people!I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    Election Day 2020

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    Today is the General Election Day here in the United States. It seems that since at least 2000, each election has been more ‘critical’ to the survival of our nation and that if the ‘wrong candidate’ wins, it’s over. We revert to barbarism and savagery and who knows what else.

    Because of all this I have become rather jaded and cynical towards republics and democracies and have been evolving into a monarchist. Say what you will about them, the empirical evidence that republics and democracies are morally or ethically superior to monarchies is getting harder and harder to see and believe. But this is a digression and the subject for other posts, probably on my other blog, In Exile.

    This election year, however, has been the first since 1860 that civil war (at the worst) or civil unrest and violence (at best) is thought by many to be the only reliable predictable outcome.

    I am going to try and have as ‘normal’ or ‘hopeful’ a day as possible. I have been applying for work-at-home gigs involving various writing opportunities and some have returned positive. They need more information and so I will be working on completing some of them, and maybe filling out some more new ones. Then I am going to spend at least 90 minutes in  front of the Blessed Sacrament tonight. It is my weekly scheduled Holy Hour but I may arrive early to pray.

    Then I will go home and watch the election results.

    My candidate is going to lose anyway, as he represents a minor third-party. This is 2020 and I have to go with my conscience as that will be accusing me when I stand before Jesus during my Particular Judgement after I die. I have to account for my actions and I firmly believe that the two major candidates are death for America. Yes, Trump is pro-life and has done much good in that area, but he hasn’t done anything that can’t be undone with an Executive Order or several. Same for the Supreme Court; Biden claims to be intent on ‘packing’ the Court with progressive judges to override Trump’s conservative appointments. A Trump win will delay the inevitable but as we’ve seen since the Watergate Scandal of 1972, we’ve gone back-and-forth between Democrat and Republican presidents. It’s almost a given that Trump will be succeeded by a Democrat. Whether it’s Biden in 2020 or someone else in 2024, only God knows right now. It’s a mess and I am just hoping that whatever happens invokes a Divine Intervention of some kind.

    Oh, don’t bother debating with me on how voting third-party is ‘wasting’ my vote. I’m done with debating that. Besides, my answer is right here, in a post on my other blog: On casting a vote for a third-party. If insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result, then supporting the two-party duopoly is insane. Voting for either party is not ‘voting for change,’ no matter how much your fantasies and wishful thinkings imagine it to be. in the long run it’s a disaster and in the short run just a delaying tactic, overrun in the next election cycle.

    So, that’s my rant for today. I hadn’t intended on the latter two paragraphs, they just sort of ‘happened.’ My advice to you, if you’re living in the United States: “Pray, Hope and Don’t Worry.” Sage advice from St. Pio of Pietrelcina. Pray a lot today. I may be clutching a Bible (probably my Jerusalem Bible, as Mother Angelica of EWTN loved it) and reading it while the disaster unveils on my screen and chaos arises.

    Take care, and stay safe.I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    “The Glories of Recovery”

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    It’s out! A piece I wrote at the request of Liguorian Magazine has appeared! A few months ago I was solicited by the editor of Liguorian, Elizabeth Herzing, for a piece on alcoholism and addiction recovery for their September 2020 issue. Here it is:

    The Glories of RecoveryI have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

    Posted in Me

    Updated contact info

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    I have updated the “About me” page in the tabs above to reflect new email addresses. I am in the process of ‘de-googling’ and have resurrected a few old and venerable Yahoo (yes, Yahoo) email addresses. One of these days I will get around to (at long last!) having my mail program send/receive with my domain name addresses.

    I have also added my social network accounts in case you want to connect with me on any of them. I am currently re-evaluating my social media activity. I have been a member of several ‘alternative to Facebook and Twitter’ social networks, but because they are essentially ghost towns I am deleting my accounts there. I just need to think about how much I really need one or two of them. I will keep Facebook and Twitter, along with LinkedIn and Pinterest, and obviously In The Rooms.I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

    My two other books are still available!
    "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)