Category Archives: Virtue

…if this chalice cannot pass away from me…

Posted on by

Continuing along with my weekly Passion meditations from (almost) every Friday, this last one on July 15th managed to get me only one more verse into Matthew’s account before stopping.

Matthew 26:42 “Again, a second time, he went and prayed, saying, “My Father, if this chalice cannot pass away, unless I drink it, let your will be done.”

(Via Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version)

If you read Twelve Step literature and have attended meetings a lot, you’ll recall “Not my will, but yours (or God’s) be done” mentioned frequently. This is a very good exercise in getting away from oneself and putting others before you. We alcoholics and addicts can be a very self-centered and selfish lot.

We don’t decide what we want to do; rather we try and discern what God wants us to do. Not an easy task but if you are a Christian it is somewhat easier.

Study the Ten Commandments.

Study the Beatitudes.

Study Matthew 25:31-45.

Study the Lord’s Prayer.

Put God first, others second and yourself third.

Practice humility.

There is another object lesson in the passage from Matthew. Jesus knew what was going to happen, and based upon the text, might have been reluctant. Perhaps His human nature exerting itself? (Probably a theologically imprecise statement, but you know what I mean.)

The thing is, quite often we are faced with doing things we’d rather not do. Few of us will face something as severe like the trial and execution that Jesus was to undergo. Be that as it may, many times we’d rather run and hide than do what’s in front of us.

Like I mentioned in an earlier post in this series, “If Jesus can feel that way, that gives us some consolation. God knows everything, but knowing and experiencing something in His human nature AND in His divine nature I think divinizes the experience. We suffer, and are sorrowful so much so at times that our spirit embraces death. Not necessarily becoming suicidal, but the degree of severity to which we are suffering can be “like death.” We, as baptized Catholics, and thus members of the Mystical Body of Christ, can draw upon this when we “offer up” or pains. He knows about them. Not just because He is an omniscient God, but because He’d been there, He suffered them, too.. Our sufferings are gathered up into the Mystical Body, and as He suffered we can draw strength and courage from that.”

See also earlier posts on this topic:
My Way or His Way

Not My Will, but Yours be Done

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak

Posted on by

Continuing on with my Friday (almost) weekly Scripture meditations on the Passion of Our Lord, I managed to get only a few more verses on July 8th than last time.

Matthew 26:41 “Be vigilant and pray, so that you may not enter into temptation. Indeed, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

“The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak,” really stuck with me. It should speak to all of us at various stages of our drinking. We want to stop, we know we must. But we can’t. We are addicted.

But we do not have to rely on the flesh for results. Our own will isn’t strong enough. It essentially never is when doing battle. We have to rely on graces from Our Lord. For example:

Matthew 19:26 “But with God, all things are possible.”

Phillipians 4:13 “Everything is possible in him who has strengthened me.”

We cannot overcome our struggles alone. We can try but we will continually fail. Even if we persevere and after each time we rise up and resolve to do better, that still takes its toll.

Granted, saints are made from those who always arise after their fall, but we can take heart that if we learn to allow God to shower us with His graces and let Him “take over,” we can be more successful. Trying to resist temptation on our own willpower will doom us to failure.

Scripture quotes via Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A fortnight of years in sobriety

Posted on by

Today marks my 14th anniversary of my last drunk. I sort of remember it, although for years I couldn’t recall the exact time (as in hour/minute) I took my last drink. I still can’t. I won’t bother with the details of my last drunk as I’ve written about them before.

Question: “How’d I do it?” Answer: “One day at a time!!” Well, there’s more to it than that, but in essence the twelve step practice of taking each day as it comes does help.

Sometimes I have to take each hour as it comes.

Speaking of the Twelve Steps, yes, they are useful. A wonderful lifeline when other things are absent or insufficient. (Absent or insufficient because they have not been developed enough as a response to external factors that may create a desire to drink.)

My Catholic Faith was and is more useful. I do know that if I had to rely solely upon the spirituality of the Twelve Steps and meeting attendance, I’d be one of those poster children for relapses; “those people” you see who enter the program, “get it” for a while, and then go back out.

Once in a while there are stressors. Anxiety, isolation, economic concerns and so forth well up and I think, “Just one drink to take the edge off.” But no, I don’t. I get through it (“One hour at a time, one minute at a time…”) and move on.

At times like those I also grab my AA literature (the Big Book or 12 & 12) and get help that way. Sometimes I feel the need for a meeting, but don’t bother (I seriously am NOT a meeting person. Never was, never will be. Online recovery works for me. I visit In the Rooms a lot.)

Sometimes when I feel that way, that my Faith and other personal means to maintain sobriety aren’t working, and I feel the need to fall back on traditional fixes like “going to a meeting” or “calling a sponsor” then I assess the state of my Faith. Sincerely, the Faith is all one should need.

Jesus came to heal the broken and wounded. The sick. We are all that and so His Church and the sacraments and devotions should work. They have, for me and for others that I’ve run across over the years. But at times they seem to be “not enough.”

But that isn’t an indictment of the Faith, or possibly not even my practice of it. There’s a list of saints very long who have gone through frequent periods of spiritual dryness, times when the Faith “wasn’t there.” They persevered and discerned that it was God’s way of drawing them closer. It is a path of spiritual growth and development (see St. Teresa of Jesus, a/k/a St. Teresa of Avila.) We feel distant and therefore we persevere and strive on, or we abandon the path.

I stay on the path. (This must be why images and symbols of “the path,” “the road,” “the way,” “the journey” resonate with me.)

I have come to feel that in those times when I feel the urge to drink is strong, and I need to respond in a traditional twelve step way, that I need to work on my Faith. I need to make a Spiritual Communion, or meditate on the Holy Spirit and His indwelling in me, or talk to the Blessed Mother. If this sounds selfish to you who are avid and devoted Twelve-Steppers, so be it. For the most part, my experience with AA has been at variance with the common conception of a “fellowship.” It’s just one more organization where I am a misfit, despite trying.

To me, AA and meeting attendance are training wheels or a crib. Eventually you outgrow them. You learn to ride on your own without the help of training wheels, and you move out of the crib. Useful to understand alcoholism and get the basics of Twelve Step spirituality and how to change your way of thinking and responding to situations, but after a fashion, one should learn what the Faith has to offer.

We were created by God. We exist to love Him and serve Him in this life and to be united and happy with Him forever in the next life (Heaven.) To get through this life He has established a Church to guide us.

We are obligated and we owe Him the duty to fully explore that Church and the Faith that springs up around Her. This does not mean leaving AA, if that suits your sobriety and you really enjoy it, then fine. It can be considered a work of mercy. Perhaps even a source for friendships.

But working within a Twelve Step program shouldn’t come at the expense of your Catholic Faith; that is like continuing to eat pureed baby food when the bread of life is readily available.

That’s all I have to say! I’ve just been very reflective on my fourteen years, where I’ve been, am now and where I’m going, along with the means for the way.

Just trudgin’ my road of happy destiny.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Debauchery

Posted on by

The Second Reading from today’s Mass for the Twentieth Sunday of Ordinary Time (boldface mine):

Ephesians 5:15-20 “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery; but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with all your heart, always and for everything giving thanks in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God the Father.”

We know about debauchery. Some of us more than others. St. Paul offers excellent advice on countering this: doing alternative, spiritual things such as singing hymns, reading the Psalms (always a great source of comfort) and giving thanks to God (showing “gratitude.”) How often have you been to an AA meeting and heard about gratitude? Be grateful for what you have, desire nothing more than having your needs fulfilled.

If you’ve been clean and sober for a while, and have explored the spiritual riches of the Faith, perhaps you’ve run across suggestions of doing the virtue in opposition to the vice you’re acting out. For example, practice humility to counter pride. This is what St. Paul is suggesting. Counter debauchery with holiness.

That may sound trite, but all this does serve to interrupt the thought processes leading to sin and relapse. Something has to be done to stop the process.

So, read the Psalms. Break out into song! 😉 Fill your heart and soul with holiness!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

in all our affairs

Posted on by

We practice these principles in all our affairs, taking the vision of God’s Will into our lives asking, “Not my will, but thine be done.”

When stumbling along the path, confused, angry, irritated or just plain lost, we recite: “God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

For we may be the only Gospel of Christ or Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous that anyone sees that day. We must be ever mindful of that, as well as when we meet other people throughout the day, that moment is but a snapshot of who they are along their journey. And that moment doesn’t define them.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

repentance posting

Posted on by

OK, I did it again! Although I didn’t formally announce it, I sort of strongly implied that I’d be blogging daily during Lent. I actually may have come out and said it, I don’t remember.

Well, no posts these past two days. {{{sigh}}}

(The “I did it again!” refers to my annual Lenten pledge to blog daily, and then failing to do so. It’s been done once, maybe twice. Probably once.)

Well, I’m not going to beat myself up over it; I will just resolve to get back up and proceed onward. And that is a lesson for all of us sinners. We repent and confess our sins; we relapse and sin again. Do we quit with the repentance and confession? After all, we’re probably just going to do it again! Of course not! Even though we will probably commit the same sins, or even new ones, we still pick our sorry selves back up and repent and confess. As long as it takes (which will probably be the rest of our lives).

This separates the saints from those who are not. Saints ALWAYS pick themselves back up and resume.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

You cannot serve both God and mammon

Posted on by

An antiphon during Evening Prayer for tonight is: “You cannot serve both God and mammon.”

The nice people at Divine Office who put together the online Liturgy of the Hours that I quoted above has this to say about “mammon.”

Definition of Mammon: Mammon is a term that was used to describe riches, avarice, and worldly gain in Biblical literature. It was personified as a false god in the New Testament. The term is often used to refer to excessive materialism or greed as a negative influence.

It is also a false god in today’s modern world, corrupting Christian culture and belief. The Lenten practice of “giving up” something may be useful here. Try “giving up” materialism. It’ll open up many avenues of grace from God. You’ll also better appreciate what you have.

I’ve talked about it before: Gratitude: Wanting what you have

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Do not deal with us according to our sins

Posted on by

The refrain from the Responsorial Psalm from today’s Mass for Monday of the Second Week of Lent is “Lord, do not deal with us according to our sins.”

See: Monday of the Second Week in Lent.

Be grateful that we have a merciful and loving Father who will not “deal with us according to our sins”, if we ask forgiveness and repent.

Lent is that time where we focus on repenting of our sins and turning closer to the Lord. Like we hear on Ash Wednesday, “Repent and belive in the Gospel,” the formula is right there. Repent, and believe in the Good News of Jesus Christ. Believe in the Gospel, don’t just read it. Live it.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Wash yourselves clean!

Posted on by

The Reading from the Morning Prayer for Saturday of the First Week of Lent:

Isaiah 1: 16-18

“Wash yourselves clean! Put away your misdeeds from before my eyes; cease doing evil; learn to do good. Make justice your aim; redress the wronged, hear the orphan’s plea, defend the widow. Come now, let us set things right, says the Lord:

Though your sins be like scarlet, they may become white as snow; Though they be crimson red, they may become white as wool.”

via DivineOffice.org.

Today is Saturday, a day in which almost all Catholic parishes offer the Sacrament of Reconciliation (a/k/a Confession). Avail yourself of it, and like the Prophet says, “Though your sins be like scarlet, they may become white as snow; Though they be crimson red, they may become white as wool!”

Make use of it often for the more you go, the less painful and scary it becomes. You gradually appreciate the effects it has upon your soul and overall spiritual development. I recommend at least once a month. (Yeah, you heard me! 😉 )

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

If the wicked man turns away

Posted on by

An excerpt from the First Reading from today’s Mass for Friday of the First Week of Lent:

Ezekiel 18: 21-23

“But if the impious man does penance for all his sins which he has committed, and if he keeps all my precepts, and accomplishes judgment and justice, then he shall certainly live, and he shall not die. I will not remember all his iniquities, which he has worked; by his justice, which he has worked, he shall live. How could it be my will that an impious man should die, says the Lord God, and not that he should be converted from his ways and live?

via Catholic Public Domain Version of the Sacred Bible.

If you’re a practitioner of the Twelve Steps, then ridding oneself of character defects and making amends for past wrongs may bear a lot more fruit than just becoming sober. If you turn away from your sins, you will gain eternal life.

We are all “trudging the road of happy destiny,” what more encouragement can there be than for the Lord to tell us that our sins will be forgotten?

Then we can safely cease dwelling on the past…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)