Category Archives: Humility

The “Page 552 Prayer to End Resentments”

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On Page 552 of the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous (their basic text), there is a very helpful suggestion on how to rid yourself of resentments towards a person.

You pray for them every day for two weeks.

According to the writer of that Big Book chapter, they had held a deep resentment towards someone. They were seeking a way rid themselves of it when they chanced upon a magazine article. In this article a preacher wrote that if one holds a resentment towards someone or something (like a place, maybe), you pray for them every day for two weeks. You pray for their health, happiness and prosperity.

It doesn’t matter if you mean it or not, if it is “just words;” you do it anyway. You will find that by the end of the two weeks, you will come to mean it. This transformation will end the resentment towards that person.

A resentment, as we have learned, means to “re-feel” something; a negative sentiment is maintained, relived and nurtured over time. There’s a pretty good chance that if you are praying daily for their health, happiness and prosperity, this old, negative “sentiment” will erode and disappear.

I tried it and so far it is working. Being the person I am, I may have to do it again concerning this acutely annoying person. But I can attest to the fact that by the end of the two weeks, I genuinely desired “health, happiness and prosperity” for this person.

The writer didn’t give the words to the prayer, just describing the instructions. My prayer went as follows:

“Dear God in Heaven, if it be your holy will, look with favor upon the health, happiness and prosperity of …N…. . I ask You this in the Name of Jesus, the Lord.” (“N” being the name of the person you are praying for.)

That’s all. Simple and to the point. No complicated formula, nothing but a simple request. Although the target is the person you are praying for, in actuality you are praying for the removal of a resentment. Why not just pray for that? “Dear God in Heaven, if it be your holy will, please remove my resentment towards …N… . I ask You this in the Name of Jesus, the Lord.” You could do that. But I think the “Page 552 Prayer” is harder for us as we are doing something difficult. Someone hurt us and now we want good things for them? Sure, God can remove our resentment if we specifically ask for that; but recall the words at the end of the “Lord’s Prayer,”

“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive the trespasses against us.”

In praying for the person that hurt us, we are forgiving them. And thus we are forgiven for anything we might have done to them. The emotional tie is broken, the resentment ceases.

Unless we stoke the fires of it again, so vigilance is needed. Let it rest. Easy, if the person is out of our lives and exists in the past. It is certainly harder if they are not, are still annoying and “things happen” to make the resentment flare up again. If that is the case, just pray harder when you are aware of situations arising that involve them; otherwise avoid them, if possible.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Go as the Lord directs you

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An excerpt from the First Reading of today’s Mass for the Second Sunday of Lent is from Genesis 12:4:

“Abram went as the LORD directed him”

via USCCB.

Abram, later renamed Abraham, goes forth with the promise that he will be made the father of great nations with innumerable descendants.

While that may be appealing for some, we alcoholics have to shoot for a more humble and modest goal: that of not drinking and staying sober. If we follow the direction of God’s will that we can discern from our prayer life, scripture meditations and talks with spouse, family and friends (and perhaps 12 Step Meetings), we can be assured of achieving this goal. There may be slip ups along the way, but we can get back up with the help of God’s graces and resume or course along the road of happy destiny.

So, pray on it and “Go as the Lord directs you.”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Love Your Enemies

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In the Gospel Reading for Saturday of the First Week of Lent (I had meant to post this yesterday, but was having connectivity issues with the blog)

(Matthew 5:43-48),

Jesus said to his disciples:

“You have heard that it was said,

You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.

But I say to you, love your enemies,

and pray for those who persecute you,

that you may be children of your heavenly Father,

for he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good,

and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust.

For if you love those who love you, what recompense will you have?

Do not the tax collectors do the same?

And if you greet your brothers and sisters only,

what is unusual about that?

Do not the pagans do the same?

So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

via USCCB.

This admonition by Jesus is a very difficult one for us alcoholics to muster the courage for. And yet I think it is essential for our long-term recovery. It is difficult indeed to “love your enemy,” but if we persist it hating “our enemies,” the festering resentments that this implies will only threaten our recovery.

It is hard. I have trouble mustering the courage to forgive those who have hurt me. I periodically go through forgiveness exercises and review my feelings towards people who have hurt me, and struggle to cut loose the emotional bonds to the hurt. It is one thing to pray and forgive them, another to no longer feel the pain they have caused. That, I think, is a sign that forgiveness has settled in, and that the power your “enemies” has over you is over. Your forgive, and you subsequently no longer replay the tapes in your head of the hurt. The bonds are cut and it is behind you. Whether you reconcile is another matter.

And so you go on. Although forgiveness is hard, it is neccessary. As long as you keep trying, chipping away at the bonds of resentment, hate and self-pity, you will make continued progess along the road of happy destiny.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

He got up and followed him

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The Gospel reading from today’s Mass is from Luke. In this excerpt (Luke 5:27-28), we read about the call of Levi, the tax collector:

After this he went out and saw a tax collector named Levi sitting at the customs post. He said to him, “Follow me.” And leaving everything behind, he got up and followed him.

via USCCB.

So, just like that? Jesus wanders past, sees the guy, asks him to abandon his job to follow him? Much to ponder here on our readiness to “follow him.”

It isn’t that we would just leave our jobs; for perhaps 90+% of you that is just impractical, to just abandon your regular life and join a religious order or some lay apostolate and “follow him” that way.

But there are a myriad of other ways to show evidence of your being a follower of Jesus. The First Reading from today’s Mass as well as yesterday’s are from Isaiah, and selections within help form the Church’s teachings on the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. Be of service to others.

Other ways are to simply live as Jesus would have you. Spend extra time during Lent studying the Gospels; pray to the Holy Spirit to guide you and direct your reading accordingly.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A heart contrite and humbled

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The response for the Psalm (Psalm 51:9) for today’s Mass is: “a contrite, humbled heart, O God, you will not scorn.”

As this is Lent, chances are that if you are taking it seriously as a means of spiritual progression in the rejecting of sin and self-will, as well as in the casting off of character defects, then you might be taking advantage of the Sacrament of Confession more so than during the rest of the year.

The Responsorial Psalm today is from Psalm 51. It is an excellent Psalm to pray and meditate upon before going to Confession. I have written a series of meditations before on it, found here: Psalm 51.

Pray for the humility to be truly contrite, and make a good Confession.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Denying yourself and taking up the Cross

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An excerpt from the Gospel Reading for today’s Mass:

Luke 9:23-25: “Then he said to all, “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. What profit is there for one to gain the whole world yet lose or forfeit himself?”

via USCCB.

Lent is a time of penance, of fasting from certain things and denying… the self? Are you using Lent as a means of denying your self-will, of choosing your will over God’s, in placing yourself above other people? Is God first, other people second, and yourself third on the list of priorities?

In the Gospel passage, Jesus lays down the conditions of discipleship. If you are to be a follower of Christ, you must place yourself at the service of others, serve them and their needs (to the best of your ability) and “take up the Cross.”

And what does that mean, to “take up the Cross?” As Jesus accepted the Cross on His way to Calvary, so to must we as we trudge along the road of happy destiny. The Cross symbolizes our willing acceptance of what it means to be Christian, as well as to accept and endure the daily trials and tribulations that come into our lives. We don’t shirk from them, we “offer them up” (donate spiritually) for our sins and those of others.

So, as you start Lent, take a look at how you are “denying yourself,” and how well you “take up the Cross.”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A Walk With the Novena of Mary Undoer of Knots, Day 9

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Today is Day 9 and thus the final one in our Novena of Mary Undoer of Knots. We ask Mary’s intercession for “this knot in my life…You know very well the suffering it has caused me…”

So, what knot is it? Is it the same one you may have prayed about daily, or one of the more knotty ones from a particular day? (A rhetorical question, don’t post the knot in the comments!)

Ponder, meditate and offer up this knot for Mary to undo. Offer up all the pain, trauma and suffering it has brought into your life. Let Mary’s maternal love work its healing into you…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A Walk With the Novena of Mary, Undoer of Knots, Day 8

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Today is Day 8 in our The Novena of Mary Undoer of Knots. We ask Mary’s intercession for us “to practice the virtues of courage, joyfulness, humility and faith…”

It has never been easy to be a Christian, even in supposedly Christian countries. The pressing needs of daily living stress us to the point of neglecting or compromising our Faith.

We should be joyful; after all God became man to be one with us and to pay the price for our sins. We became His adopted children. We will gain Heaven if we follow His will, as best we are able.

We humbly pray that our Faith is increased, we have the courage to practice and follow it and to use it to make a difference in the world.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A Walk with the Novena of Mary Undoer of Knots, Day 2

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Today we cover “sins of egoism, pride, rancor and … lack of generosity and humility…” in our daily walk with The Novena of Mary Undoer of Knots.

These sins blind you. The more of your “self” that you are bound up in, the less you are open to God’s graces, the less you see Jesus in other people. You adopt a “me versus them” attitude, with the “me” feeling inherently superior.

And leave it to an alcoholic to feel superior to others, even with all the serious character defects these sins reveal.

Work on becoming smaller. To quote St. John the Baptist:

John 3:30 He must increase, while I must decrease.

via John – Catholic Public Domain Version of the Sacred Bible.

Becoming “smaller” is also the “Little Way” of St.Therese of Lisieux, who taught that one should do everything with love, even the smallest, most insignificant task. Nothing is too small for God if done with Love.

So perhaps do “little things” as if they were the most important things in the world at the moment.

They just might be, to someone.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

THE EPIPHANY OF THE LORD

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Today is the Solemnity of THE EPIPHANY OF THE LORD, the commemoration of when the Magi, or “Three Wise Men,” came to honor Jesus and worship Him.

Three pagan monarchs traveled a great distance of thousands of miles to visit our Lord. Do you, a believer and probable Catholic, take the time to attend Mass or Adoration to honor and worship Him?

“Epiphany” also means in popular usage a “sudden realization or awareness.” Comparable to the “spiritual awakening” mention is 12 Step movements, has your “epiphany” in recovery lead you closer to Jesus (and also to His Church?)

Much to ponder on today.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)